---
title: preferred pronoun
slug: preferred-pronoun
flag:
  text: 'avoid'
  level: avoid
defined: true
excerpt: a word that substitutes for a noun, in particular, a person's name; may not necessarily align with their gender presentation or their gender identity; the addition of the word 'preferred' should be avoided as it implies a person's pronouns is a choice
speech: noun
alt_words:
  - pronoun
---

a word that substitutes for a noun, in particular, a person's name; a person's pronouns does not necessarily align with their gender presentation or their gender identity; a person gets to say what pronouns they and others use to refer to them; pronouns can be fluid based on context and presentation and change over time.

## Issues

Preferred pronoun can imply that this is merely what is _preferred_ rather than what is _real_. Using this can reinforce the idea that someone's pronouns are a choice rather than what is true for them or it's merely a preference and that you can use whatever pronouns you'd like for them.

## Impact

Preferred pronouns can delegitimise pronouns of trans and non-binary people in particular, especially when their pronouns are wrongly assumed to be different than they are or [neopronouns](/definitions/neopronouns) that are less commonly known. Delegitimising their pronouns delegitimes aspects of their identity, reinforces transmisia and non-binary erasure, and leads to harm against them.

## Usage Tip

Use [pronouns](/definitions/pronouns) instead.